As many of you are gathering the Estrella Jail does not spend a penny on the luxury accommodations. However, let chat about the food. Yes, the gourmet prepared food. First I will discuss the most importart meal of the day, breakfast. Yummy!!!
Breakfast was the same most days for everyone but me, do to my wheat allegy. So, if you enjoy breakfast be prepared, this is the best time of the day in jail. Do you dream of eggs, bacon, oatmeal, frosted flakes, etc? Then do not, I repeat do not get arrested in Maricopa County, because you will never eat breakfast type foods again.
Breakfast for the multitude of inmates consists of 2 ounces of peanut butter, 2 whole wheat rolls, an orange and 2 small cartons of milk. That is the breakfast sack 5 days a week. On the other 2 days, now hold, do not get too excited, instead of peanut butter, you get deli meat!!! Yum.
So what is there to comment about, well not much, I mean the milk was always cold. That's the best thing, the milk was cold.
The peanut butter is fresh, there is a rumor that it is made fresh everyday by the kitchen. If you get really lucky, the bugs were caught up in the grinder and you did not see them as you ate. Yes, bugs!! Why do I know there are bugs in the peanut butter, because sometimes they did not get ground up all the way. If you were lucky, you got a bug head included with yours or if you are really charmed the whole bug.
I can not comment about the bread which was also rumored to be made by the kitchen everyday. I am a allergic to wheat so I can only guess what kind of bugs are included in the preparation of those tasty little buns. I wonder if bugs help the nutritual value of those buns? Retorical question only!!!
So, on to the oranges, as I understand, all the food is donated to the jail. A wonderful money saving tip from the Sheriff. So, with all the extra oranges around the city of Phoenix it is not a surprise that each and everyday breakfast included an orange. Did I mention that the oranges came from the wonderful extra orange trees around the city. Have you ever really look at some of those beautiful trees as you drive around the city. Those lovely green, sweet smelling trees in the spring? In the city of Phoenix, our prime orange season is early in December thur February, I was in jail in July. Love those oranges! Not sure when they were pick, but some of them were mighty ripe. Of course, those extra ripe oranges made pretty good jail house punch. I'm talking adult punch, not kid friendly punch! Of course I never partook of the punch, but the smell was a good indication of the potency of the fermented orange rinds.
Well that cover breakfast - wait I forgot about the meat that we were so graciously given 2 days a week. Well, there is not much to say, but I did mention before that all the food was donated? So, do I need to say more except donated food. So, lets think about this, use your imagination, donated food . . . . deli meat . . . shelf life. . . . . yum!!!!
Now remember, that was for the multitude of inmates. I was different, because of my food allergies, I was given a special breakfast sack. Let's see . . . . hummm not sure I can remember my sack. Right, and Phoenix will experience 80 degree weather in July!! So on with my very nutritious breakfast. Let's see, hum yep peanut butter - check, orange - check, milk - nope, I got little jug juices, bread - nope, I received stale cold corn tortilla. Yes, that about covers it!! Wait, I never got meat. Not me, nope, because I was on a "special diet" I was lucky enough not to get the donated deli meat. So, I had buggy peanut butter everyday for 32 days. No meat for me.
The real kicker about breakfast is according to the Jail House Handbook, you have to each all the food within one hour of receiving. If you don't, it is considered contraband and you could receive a "warning". The DO's had great pleasure in tossing your bunk and tossing any extra food, that included the pregnant and diabetic inmates too.
As I mentioned in the beginning getting breakfast was the best part of the day. Can you wait to hear about dinner?? Oh, hold tight I will blog about dinner soon enough. In the meantime, each a good breakfast every day, it is the most important part of the day.
